Monday, October 22, 2012

Super Concussionator

     Before you read this, please note that I am not proof reading this (lol like I ever do) and that I am on some pretty heavy medication and have a concussion and am using Mom's work computer so I'm not used to this keyboard. You'll have to excuse the extra stupidity but I swear all this happened. But you should read it because it's fucking crazy.

     It started off early last week. I don't remember the day exactly, but I remember having a hard time with the post about my nineteenth birthday because I was feeling really sick. Nausea, headache, stomachache, exhaustion, sore throat... But I wasn't actually sick. It went on like this for two days. I think. It might have been three, but I don't remember.

      Wednesday night, while I was writing about my kitten and fucked up dreams (and then posting it after midnight), my computer was running it's weekly virus scan. Let me explain how this works. I used Defender Pro before I got internet on my laptop (I hooked up to free wifi before people put passwords on it) but then we actually had to pay for internet and Norton came with it. Eventually, about four months ago, Defender Pro expired and when I tried to buy more, it wouldn't download. Since I had Norton, I was only pissed about spending the extra money but didn't think anything of it. Then on Thursday morning, when the scan finally finished, it said I had two Trojan viruses. Normally, the scan could get rid of them. Except that it won't when it's expired; it'll just find them.

     Any comments I have left on your blogs since then, have been from my phone. I'm using Mom's work computer for this post because her boss gave me permission and isn't here, and I need to stay awake. Anything from Twitter or Facebook (for those few of you who have me on there) has all been from my phone. This is the first time I've been on the computer so I'm sorry about typos and all that shit but the screen is really tiny on my phone. Momma called the computer fixer people to pick up my laptop and we're on the waiting list, but we don't know when they'll be able to fix it.

     Later on Thursday, I discovered that one of my ear piercings (which I had for over a year and only left the earring out for three days) had closed up. While I was pissed about that, my "Godmother" called and said that I had an interview at 2 PM the next day where I've been trying to get a job for the past couple months (but I had to be 19 and then they waited almost a whole month to call back- turns out they lost my application). Fuck. But also yay.

     Friday, Momma and I followed Mr Fix-It to the restaurant for my interview. Since I can't drive, Mom needs to know where I'll be so that I can have three different rides. I'm supposed to stay on Mr Fix-It's schedule since he lives down the road from me and he's their favorite person ever, but if he gets sick or I have to trade shifts or pick up a shift or whatever, I need an extra back-up ride. So we went.

     The interview went great. I had to fill out a new application and I was supposed to talk to a different manager instead of the owner (like last time) but that manager never showed up. So I talked to the lady manager, after waiting for nearly an hour. She barely looked over my application and then told me I needed to get the uniform and what to get exactly and then shook my hand and said, "Welcome aboard. I'm not the trainer so I'll call you when I know when training will start next week."

     Momma and I left, since Mr Fix-It had to start work. We went to the store and got the belt and socks I needed, since they were right there where we could easily get to it without looking. We also got other stuff but I can't remember what. I do know that we went to the bank. Then we went out to eat; both because were celebrating that I got a job and we didn't want to cook. By the time we got back home, I had to drive because it was dark (on a super curvy road I've never driven before and I've never driven in the dark- but hey, I didn't swerve).

     I had unplugged the lamp by the couch when we left to save electricity and since the dogs unplug it anyways by running around. When The Big Dog goes inside, the first thing he does, is jump on the couch and wait for his treat before going to get water.

     Let me explain... The Big Dog is roughly 115-120 pounds. I have no idea how much I weigh. Most people are guessing 120ish. Last time I was on a scale, it was somewhere between 130-140. He is almost as big as I am in height and weight. His chain outside is a logging chain 3/4 inches thick because he broke everything smaller.

This is a picture of his tree from back in March. See how he's wittled the tree down from running?
     As I was bending down to plug the lamp back it, he jumped onto the couch. I got knocked in the head and the world went fuzzy and dark for a minute, but I caught myself before I fell. If any of you have had a legit glycemic crash when you're about to pass out but catch yourself, you'll know what I'm talking about. If not, it was something like in the movies when there's an explosion and it gets blurry and stuff.

     That was around 6:30 (almost exactly three hours after the interview). After that, my head was still hurting and things were a little blurry, but I tried to ignore it. I even took a shower and ate and stuff. But around the time Momma was going to bed, between 11 and 12, things started to get worse fast. I couldn't focus my eyes. It was as blurry as when I was hit in the head. I saw in triple vision. I thought I was going to throw up. It was hard to think and even a little hard to speak. So we called Shorty to take me to the emergency room since Mom is night blind and she was drunk.

     On the way out to the car, I had almost no balance and I was so dizzy and things were spinning so much, I bumped my head getting into the car. Which kind of defeated the purpose, but we got there eventually. On the way, I sent Sissi and Wolfy texts to tell them I was going to the ER, but I don't remember what I told them. I don't think I was very clear and I remember a lot of typos. Getting out of the car, when we finally got there, the security guard put me in a wheelchair because I couldn't really keep myself up anymore.

     Some nurse dude tried to make me fill out my paper work. First of all, I've never filled out my own emergency room paperwork before. That's something I'm still learning. Secondly, I was there for a head injury. I almost forgot how to spell my name and I could barely see what I was writing.. But eventually Mom was able to empty her pockets and come through and fill things out for me.

     A lady nurse with pretty hair hooked me up to a machine to check my heart and pulse and stuff. Then she asked a bunch of questions but I think Mom had to answer most of them. I remember not knowing my weight and her asking if I was depressed (Mom said no, I tried to correct her but I think they discussed it more before deciding to put "not diagnosed; experiences depression episodes" or something like that) and then Mom reminding me I have Sissi, and "a loving boyfriend", and Brother and I smiled a bunch.

     We ended up in a room and they made me put on a hospital gown. Mom had to help me. The nurses left and Shorty closed her eyes, but I couldn't dress myself. Then they had me pee in a cup for a pregnancy test (and also for drugs and alcohol but they don't tell you that). Mom got pissed and decided to tell the entire hospital it's not possible for me to be pregnant and for some reason, I thought that was one of the funniest things ever.

     I laid down and almost blacked out. Then the nurse hooked me back up to a heart monitor. By throwing the gown up and putting her hands up the gown. (To anyone in the hospital I flashed, I'm really sorry. I didn't know she was going to do that and it scared the fucking shit out of me. To my boyfriend, blame the nurse because that was really stupid and bitchy of her. To the nurse, fuck you for that.) Then I don't remember a lot.

     There were a lot more questions and a lot were the same but it was a different nurse. I had a hard time focusing and I don't remember much. I think I was a bit more lucid because I was laying down but I remember even less about this part. I do know that I was absolutely fucking terrified.

     Mom went and got water and I was pretty mean about, "Don't drink my water" but only because she had been drinking and ew. Nurses basically left me alone and I was shaking a lot. The heart monitor was kind of fascinating. And I remember practically losing my mind wanting to text Wolfy and Sissi. Mom and Shorty made me laugh some.

     After being there for hours, they shined lights in my eyes and then told me they thought it was a mild concussion. I remember that part pretty clearly. The doctor was standing over me. He held out one hand and said, "Some concussions can turn you into a vegetable, where you'll never really wake up and you're unable to do anything" then he held the other hand about six inches away and said, "Some concussions will make you a little dizzy and give you a headache" then he moved the first hand towards the second hand but left about an inch of space and said, "I think you're closer to the mild version but we're going to do a catscan to make sure nothing is serious."

     And so, I got a catscan. The guy who pushed the bed went really fast and even with the rails up, I thought I was going to throw up and fall over. I couldn't remember if a catscan was just a head thing or if it was a full body thing, so I asked if it was bad that I'm claustrophobic  He told me no, it's okay, because as long as I stay still for a minute then it'll be over and it's only my head and I can still see.

     I had to get myself onto the table and lay down. They strapped me down around my stomach, which honestly didn't help the whole claustrophobic thing, and my head went into the machine. It moved over me a few times with really bright lights and sounded like a plane taking off. All I remember doing was praying because I was shaking so badly, that it honestly looked like I was having a seizure. Then it was over and he took me back to my room.

     I was still shaking a bit by the time we got back to the room but the doctor said that the test results were good. Nothing was seriously wrong, just a pretty bad bump to the head. He also told me he was going to put me on two medications. One medication is twice a day for seven days to prevent inflammation and the other is a mix of two medications and caffeine for the pain, which I take every four hours as needed until I run out (there are 20 pills). Let me tell you this, these medications are mother fucking strong.

     After what felt like forever, I was finally released at 4 something in the morning. After all the drama with Mom getting pissed for them wanting to make sure I'm not knocked up, they left it in the room and never tested it. Which kind of pissed me off because that was not an easy task to pull off when I couldn't even stand up right. They made me walk out even though Mom (with her screwed up neck) was supporting me, but she's also like 100 pounds. Or 15 pounds. I'm not really sure. Then the security guards asked how I was.

     Shorty tried to make me go in the elevator to get to the car, that she had parked after dropping me at the entrance. I started crying and refused. So she went and got the car and left us there. They protected my head when I got in the car and we got home around 4:30.

     Saturday, we went to get my prescriptions at WalMart and I found out that they don't sell nose rings at that one (I wanted a clear/silver one instead of a purple one) which kinda sucked because I saw one before with the stone shaped like a little butterfly and it was awesome. We went to lunch afterwards so I could take it and she told the owner (who escorted us to our table and helped me avoid stairs) that I had "a concussion by dog" and then told me and him that I'm the "Concussionator". We went and found out that the piercers at the tattoo place weren't there (we were out and I was already in pain, I decided why not).

     Things got really confusing and foggy after that. I know we went and bought dinner and people kept glaring at me because I was falling so much. We went to Sonic and Mom bought ice and told the lady who works there about me. She saw a picture of The Big Dog and freaked out like "THAT IS A REALLY BIG ACCIDENT" and I thought that was fucking hilarious. Then we went back to the park. I think I may have been in and out of consciousness because there are a lot of missing pieces, but we stopped by and saw Shorty and I told her I owe her a hug and there was a lot of hysterical laughter. Then we saw our neighbor outside who owes me money for watching his dog and wants me to watch her again this weekend and I was like, "Well I'll watch her if you actually pay me" and that was pretty bitchy. Turns out he got confused and didn't know he owed me money. Oops. Then we went home and I think I passed out.

     At one point, I woke up for a while and took a shower. Momma gave me shower rules. Keep the water temperature evened out. Don't flip my hair to put in the conditioner. Don't shave my legs. I was allowed to use a lightsaber but I don't even have one and I don't really understand the movies anyways. The shower went fine but when I was sitting down to get into bed, I managed to wack my head again. Figures. It hurt like a mother fucker.

     Sunday, I was a little less... drugged. Momma told me that the lady manager called Saturday night and wanted me to start Sunday, but Mom just said I was sleeping and we didn't have time to get my uniforms yet (all true), so I'm scheduled for Thursday through Saturday instead. But we had to get my uniforms on her day off so we did.

     It took us three different stores to get everything and I'm almost certain that anyone who wants to start working there must have to take out a loan on their house just to get the clothes, but we managed to get it done. The lady at the shoe store was asking why I kept falling so we told her and she thought it was hilarious until she realized we were serious. Then everyone within a 30 foot radius told me to wear the no-slip shoes out so I wouldn't hit my head again.

     In the last store, we had to get in an elevator to go downstairs. I prefer stairs or an escalator, or an elevator I can see out of. But we were stuck in a tiny one that I couldn't see anything. So I almost had a panic attack. Then we had to get back in it to go upstairs. Both trips knocked me so off balance that I thought I needed a wheelchair again.

     The tattoo shop was open and the piercers were there so we went inside and had the same lady from last year (who did my second ear lobe piercings and my nose) redo my closed up piercing (which hurt more than the first time) and put a matching earring in the other ear since I don't know how to change that type of earring. We also bought a silvery/clear nose ring and had her put it in my nose (which hurt more than actually getting it pierced). Here is a link of earrings similar to mine. It has a little ball on both sides though and you have to take one off to get it through the piercing hole.

     We went out to Chinese after that and everyone kept glaring at me. I'm not even kidding. I took another pain pill and people kept looking at me like I was like the devil incarnate or something. I don't know why. I was nice to everyone even though I didn't speak unless I had to. I didn't even walk much; I had Mom do it because carrying hot soup while heavily medicated with a nasty concussion isn't a good thing to do.

     Then we went home and I don't remember too much after that. I took a shower and kept hitting my ears. They were both sore and it seemed to be the target of a lot of pain. My nose was pretty sore too but I was smarter about that. Then I braided my hair so it wouldn't get all tangled in the hoops.

     This morning, Mom woke me up and we went to her work. She called the computer people. I think I already said that. A lot of people ask how I am and I answer with, "Last week or in general?" and tell them I'm fine in general but this last week has sucked. Mostly I'm just trying to stay awake and I'm using her boss's computer to write this post, but with permission.

     Hopefully I'll have my laptop back Thursday but if not, I'll use a prewritten post. I should be fine to work on Thursday, but I still have to take at least one of the medications to prevent any swelling or whatever. Oh, and instead of being a waitress like I applied for, she's starting me as a hostess (person who leads you to your table and takes your drink order) and a runner (person who brings food to the table when the place is too busy and the waitress/waiter can't). That way I can learn the restaurant and the dishes, while still in training and learning and stuff. If you write a post, I'll eventually comment, but probably only if the link is on Twitter and it'll be from my phone until my laptop is fixed so sorry about that.

     Oh, and last night, I found out that even without the test and the fact that it isn't possible, I'm really not pregnant.

     This week sucks. Except for the job. That's pretty awesome.

P.S. I will probably have split shifts at the restaurant and that means I need books. If you don't want to buy them for me, you can at least suggest some for me. And I know there are ebooks from my lovely writer bloggy friends, but I don't have anything to read that on and I'm not going to lug my laptop around. So it has to be published in paperback. Because I'm too cheap for hardback.

P.S. #2 My head hurts.

4 comments:

  1. Concussions suck. Glad it was a mild one. My nephew got really screwed up for a while over a small head bump.

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    1. Concussions really do suck. I hope your nephew was okay after the bump to the head. That sounds like it really sucked.

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  2. Wow, that's craziness! Thank God it didn't end up being more severe than it was!

    Good luck with the job! I'm glad that you finally got it. I hope you like it!

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    1. haha It really was crazy. I was so terrified. I'm so happy that it wasn't worse than it is.

      Thank you though! I'm really excited about it, as well as nervous. Any tips on how to impress my bosses? lol

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