Tuesday, May 8, 2012

What Were We Thinking?

     On Friday night, Boss Lady called me and said that she had a friend who needed a babysitter. They usually don't need one but on occasion, things can't be worked out, and they found themselves without anyone to watch their three kids. I agreed and Boss Ma'am picked me up the next day.

     Boss Ma'am and Boss Sir have three kids. Child 1 is four. Child 2 is two. Child 3 is seven months old. All are boys. With as much babysitting experience as I've had, I have never watched boys that were so young. Actually, I've never watched anyone under eleven months either. So it was a bit nerve racking for me.

     The plan was for me to watch them on my own from 2:00 until 5:30, but Boss Ma'am didn't even pick me up until 3:00. After that, Boss Lady was going to pick the boys and I up to go hang out at her house until Boss Ma'am got off work at 9:30. That's not really what happened.

     I didn't really have a problem watching the boys by myself. The older two mainly stayed in their room, trying to build a castle out of old VHS tapes. (I kind of freaked out because they were VHS tapes and not DVDs. It was quite a shock for somebody who hasn't seen them since she was eleven-ish.) I stayed in the living room, trying to coax the baby into drinking from the bottle since he was hungry.

     Boss Lady picked me up on time and after running around trying to find everything, we got the boys into the car. There was an issue with the carseats that took forty-five minutes to fix, with the baby crying for the last fifteen until I picked him up. We had an audience of about six people. One guy was even smoking a cigarette. When we finally left, Boss Lady and I were in near hysterics and swore never to speak in detail of it again.

     We decided that the boys were too hyper and having six kids in one small house could not possibly end well, so we made a very stupid choice. We decided to take them to Chuck E. Cheese's. We stopped by Boss Lady's house to load her three kids into the car and then we were on our way.

     From the second I got out of the car, I had glares from everyone I walked by. Why, you ask? I was holding a small baby and escorting the two little boys into the building. As Boss Lady pointed out, "Anyone who saw us would think we had been... very busy." No shit. I don't think I've ever gotten so many dirty looks before.

     We got The Oldest and The Middle Child to take Child 1 and Child 2 off to play games. Boss Lady and The Youngest went off to order pizza. Over all, things were going pretty well. I was surprised and impressed by how well things were going, minus judgmental people who need to get their heads out of their asses.

     From 6:30-ish until 9:00, we were at Chuck E. Cheese's. I won't bore you with all the details so I'll just sum it up a little bit. Child 1 would not stay with anybody for nothin'. Every time you blinked, he was gone. Child 2 was remarkably well-behaved for a two year old but I had to finish up four ski-ball games for him because he couldn't throw it far enough. Child 3 only left my arms so I could eat (for ten minutes or so) and twice so I could hunt down Child 1 (about five minutes each). The Oldest was my hero because he helped out so much. The Middle Child lacked the ability to watch any kid at all but he didn't cause trouble. The Youngest stayed in Boss Lady's arms pretty much constantly, except when she sent her off with The Oldest so she could eat.

     That's a long time to watch six kids and not be able to put down a very squirmy baby. My arms were numb until Monday (of course, I watched The Youngest for eight hours on Saturday and she was super clingy too). Well, at least I should be able to throw one heck of a punch now, with all the muscles I've gotten from not being able to put a kid down.

     Even though things went so well, it was very stressful and tiring. We really needed a third person (well, technically The Oldest would be the third person, but he wanted to play games too) and either some strollers or some safer highchairs for Child 3 and The Youngest. There was no way either of us could have done it on our own.

     We met Boss Ma'am back at Boss Lady's house and transferred Child 1, 2, and 3 into the right car while we explained to her why we gave the neighbors a show and not to worry if they talked to her about the two lunatics who had picked up her kids. Boss Lady hugged me twice and told me "Rachel, I love you so much. Thank you for staying with me today." twice. Then Boss Ma'am took me home because she lives on the same side of town as I do.

     The next morning, my arms and legs hurt from running around and holding a baby for so long. My head hurt from screaming kids. And I was completely relying on a vanilla cappuccino to stay awake. Boss Lady and I still don't know what we were thinking about taking them to Chuck E. Cheese's. We have decided we need to be committed to an insane asylum.


  1. I once took an unplanned trip into St Louis with my kids. My daughter being less than 1 year old. Being alone with them I had to carry her all day. The Zoo, the Arch all over down town. By the end of the day, my arms were rubber.

    1. Sounds like a fun day, minus your arms slowly turning into rubber. haha

  2. Chuck E Cheese is a place of evil. I'm glad you made it through the day alive!

    1. Thank you. A few times, I wasn't sure I would survive to write this post, but I'm happy I did.