Thursday, September 20, 2012


     The titles is in all caps, because I AM FUCKING EXCITED, OKAY? Kianwi from Simply She Goes (who most of you know, because she is awesome) gave me something that I just picked up at UPS yesterday and I have been excited to write about and show off, because despite what she says, IT IS AWESOME AND PRETTY.

     It actually all started months ago, when I held a contest because my mom wanted to name the car. There were only a few suggestions, but they were actually really awesome. To be fair, I wrote everyone's name down on little pieces of paper and made a video of my mom pulling the winner's name from my fucking awesome cowgirl hat that I got last Christmas. Honestly, I had a feeling Kianwi was going to win, because I planned to say the winner's name, and I have no idea how to pronounce that. You can read the actual post here.

     Then, a couple of weeks ago, she announced that she had taken a pottery class and made three (what she calls ugly) ceramic pots, but she would be giving one of them away to a winner, who's name would be randomly drawn. I always comment on her posts, but I was especially excited to comment on this one, because they're pretty and I wanted one. You can read that post here (and my comment- it's the very first one).

     About a week later, her dog decided on the two winners. There are two videos of her dog picking two names and guess what? Mine was the very first one. How fucking cool is that? I was ridiculously excited and may or may not have screamed. You can read that post (and watch the videos) here.

     You'd think it would end there, but it doesn't.

     After emailing her and double checking to make sure that I wasn't emailing some random stranger, I gave her all of my contact info. To be more exact, I gave her my mom's office contact info. Why? Because all of the mail goes through there anyways, since it's literally in the backyard (or we're in the office's back yard- we're in a giant circle so it depends on how you look at it, I guess). I had a feeling she would be using UPS and when they don't deliver at the office, The Big Dog (who weighs upwards of 115 pounds) scares them away. I've never had a problem with that before, so I didn't think there would be one this time.


     After sending it, she said that she had tracked it's progress and was now in my city, but it could not be delivered because of an invalid lot number or whatever the official phrase is. I explained everything and can't tell you how badly I felt because I had managed to cause trouble for her when that was exactly what I was trying to avoid. So she gave me the tracking number and told me that I would have to call them to straighten it out and gave me the number.

     Since I can't hear the automated machines (maybe because of my hearing loss?), I texted the tracking number to Mom's phone and asked her to call. They said it was an invalid tracking number but I checked it and it matched what was on the email. I emailed Kianwi back (last Thursday) and explained that we would just go to UPS the following day (last Friday) and pick it up since all I would have to do would be to show my ID.

     You'd still think it would end there, wouldn't you? It doesn't.

     On Friday, Mom didn't get out of work until it was too late, because it's too far away. I live in a really big city and UPS is literally on the whole other side of it. I thought it was closer, but I never actually knew where it was. Which is ironic because I used to drive right passed it at least four times a month (I used to have a friend who lived in the town that's on the border of our's- she's closer to UPS than we are- and I would spend literally every other weekend at her house). One would think I would have noticed it.

     They were closed all weekend, which sucked, since we had plenty of time on Saturday and were actually very bored... which resulted in us causing trouble at the outdoor mall. (I will eventually post about that.) So our new plan was to go Monday.

     It rained so hard on Monday, that we couldn't see to go anywhere. We actually had more rain than with any hurricane that has hit our area. We have a few leaks in our house and we used literally all of the towels trying to sop up the water. I was using the hairdryer to try to dry them off since we couldn't exactly get to the laundry mat in that kind of weather. (Just so you know, if a room in your house is cold, you can turn on a hairdryer and it will warm it up fast.)

     Tuesday, we had another fucking storm and we were still so flooded, that we had no chance to go anywhere unless we either wanted to swim (it's a bit too far for that and I don't have a bathing suit anymore anyways) or take a boat (it's hard to get to a boat rental place when you're surrounded by water and boatless).

     But finally, Wednesday came, and we were able to get to UPS. Ironically, it was also the last day that they were willing to hold the package before they would have to send it back. We drove all the way there and went inside. I had to show my ID. We had to explain The Big Dog three times before the lady agreed that I am who I say I am. Either that or she thought we were crazy and wanted us to leave.

     There was a lady next to us, who was trying to mail some herbs and I was probably the only one in the room who had a delayed reaction of turning to stare at her. It took me at least two full minutes before I realized that they all assumed that she was trying to mail a... different type of pot. It took me until today to see the hilarity and irony in it.

     After going a few other places (including Mom dragging me all around WalMart and telling me "Pick a bag", "Pick a tag", "Pick tissue paper", "Pick stickers", "Pick a giant candy bar", "Pick movies", for my birthday- it was weird- then she yelled at me that I "don't know shit and get nothing until my actual birthday") we finally got home and I was able to open my package.

     I went next door to take pictures, because that's where it will be staying since it will be better protected from animals over there. Not only that, but there isn't a place to put anything over here, because I have too much shit already.

Enough bubble wrap for hours of entertainment!


It's lopsidedness makes it even cuter!

An unexpected surprise.

An incredibly sweet note that made me smile.
I erased her very unique name though.
Also, I have no idea why it's sideways and I can't fix it.
     Kianwi, I just wanted to apologize for all of the trouble I caused again. I know you said you weren't worried about it, but I really didn't mean to make things so difficult. Also, thank you so much for the pretty pot. I love it and since I won't be having house guests, this is my first attempt at showing it off.

P.S. I was right. It is going to be incredibly fun saying "I got it from a stranger on the internet who named my mom's car because her dog picked my name." because that is so not the answer anyone would expect.

P.S. #2 I kind of want to name it. Is that weird?

P.S. #3 Totally irrelevant, but Momma told me the cutest little kid story ever about herself last night, that Grandma told her. She forbade me from putting it on Facebook so I'm putting it on the blog!
On her first day of preschool when she was four, Grandma sent her to school in a short dress. After school, Grandma asked her how her day was. So Momma crossed her arms and pouted and said "DEM BOIZ WERE BUTHERING ME!"

P.S. #4 No, really, I want to name it. Maybe there will be another contest in the near future.

P.S. #5 Kianwi's name is actually one of my favorite names.


  1. Ha ha! When I saw the title of the post, I thought maybe you got a new kitten or something :) So surprised that you wrote an entire post about my ugly pot. I completely adore you, you are so cute!

    I can't believe you are still apologizing. I'm the one that feels bad that you had to go through all that trouble to get a silly, crooked pot. I am thrilled that you like it, though. For sure it has to have a name!

    As far as Kianwi, since you've seen most of my real name on the package, you may have figured out how I created it...two letters from each of my names.

    1. haha I'm not going to be adopting anymore animals right now, unless I have to rescue another little baby. lol
      But I HAD to write about it! I was hoping that I would surprise you with it. But you are so sweet, you don't even know. x3

      You shouldn't feel bad! It was my mistake that caused all the trouble! I love the inside out egg pot! I know the general prize I want to give out, but I can't have the contest or say what it is until I find it (though I might tell you, if you promise not to tell! lol).

      I actually didn't look at your name on the package. xD The box is still sitting next door but I do really like your first name.

  2. Eep!!! You got the yellow one too!!!!! I said that one was my favorite because it was my favorite color. :) I'm glad to see that I'm not completely out of the loop here. Kianwi is a sweetheart!!!!!

    Lovvveee this post. Seeing bloggers interact makes me a happy lady. :) :)

    P.S. I'm sooooo glad to be back tooooo!!!!!

    1. haha Yellow isn't a color I pick too often, but I love this one! It looks like an adorable egg so I love it. RIGHT? It was soooooooo sweet of her to send it!!!

      x3 I'm glad you like the post. It's fun to interact with other bloggers!

      P.S. Yay! We all missed you so much!