"Hm... Hows abouts elephants? Big cute fluffy elephants. I haven't seen enough blog posts on them recently.. Such a shame."
You know what? I haven't seen any blog posts about elephants, ever! That's actually pretty disappointing. Why don't more people write about elephants? I wrote an open letter to people who imitate elephants while blowing their noses a couple of days ago, but that's no where near the same!
So! I'm going to tell you guys about my mom used to work in one of the biggest zoos in America, though I'm still not going to say which one. I have many stories I can tell about the zoo, now that I'm thinking about it, but they're mostly related to Mom so maybe I can convince her to write a guest post one day...
While she was working at the zoo, they had many animal births. One of the births was of a baby girl elephant. I don't know how famous she was elsewhere, but she was incredibly famous in our city and she was all anyone wanted to talk about. Of course, she was probably the cutest elephant to ever be born, so that was completely understandable.
Another cute elephant is little baby Dumbo. You know who Dumbo is, right? The famous elephant with the giant ears, created by Disney. Who can look at Dumbo and not want to hug him and tell him that he's adorable and then take him to his mommy?
The dancing pink elephants, not so cute. They used to scare the fucking shit out of me when I was a little kid. The clowns were also pretty terrifying but the pink elephants made me not want to watch the movie, since I was too little to understand that the mouse was drunk and hallucinating. Totally kid friendly.
I really don't know much about elephants so I'm struggling with what to say here. I know that they're not actually scared of mice, but rather, scared of anything that they may step on. I know that I rode one with one of my aunts when I was like three but I don't remember it. I know that they're mostly gentle animals. I know that Scar's hyenas lived in the Elephant Graveyard, outside of the Pridelands, before Scar was a total asshole, killed his brother, blamed his nephew, and took over.
The only other thing I really know is that elephants are hunted and struggling for survival by a bunch of people who want their tusks to sell. Stop it. If you keep killing them, there won't be any left. Go find a new job. You'll have to anyways if you drive them into extinction.
In conclusion: Elephants are awesome. I like elephants. If I had a bag of peanuts, I would give it to the elephants, but I don't have a bag of peanuts because I ate them all. Sorry.